PROLOGUE - OVERHEARD DIALOGUE

SOLDIER 1: What's in the pot today?

COOK: Same as yesterday.

SOLDIER 2: Same slop as always? Bloody hell.

COOK: Don't eat it.

SOLDIER 1: Watch it, grease-burner, or you'll end up in the soup.

COOK: I cook what I'm given. Can't help it.

SOLDIER 1: Goat stew today!

COOK: Not quite.

SOLDIER 2: Why the hell not?! My gut's been rumbling since morning. Been thinking of it all day!

COOK: Goat wandered off last night.

SOLDIER 1: Wandered off to the knights, I'll wager. Roastin' over the fire somewhere by now.

SOLDIER 2: Stuffing themselves at our expense. So, what do we get?

COOK: Porridge.

SOLDIER: Ah, the aroma...

COOK: Told you I can cook. As long as I get the supplies.

SOLDIER: Hm... Where'd they get the meat from?

COOK: Dunno, don't care. Might very well be the lads that fell yesterday.

SOLDIER 1: Anything to drink?

COOK: Wine.

SOLDIER 2: You're daft...!

COOK: No. You deaf? Wine.

SOLDIER 1: Hear that? We're getting wine!

SOLDIER 2: Wouldn't rejoice if I were you. Foltest hands out wine before an assault. Thinks his men'll grow unnaturally large bollocks.

SOLDIER 1: Porridge. With pork cracklings.

SOLDIER 2: Ah, my mother used to make porridge... Never had better in me life.

SOLDIER 1: Cook's certainly won't top your mother's.

SOLDIER 2: What's in the pot, cook?

COOK: Turnips.

SOLDIER 1: Crawl under a rock and die.

SOLDIER 1: You heard...? After your stew yesterday, half of seventh company had the runs.

COOK: Didn't hear it.

SOLDIER 2: Now you bloody well have. If it ever happens again, I'll slaughter and cook you meself. Except who'd eat that carcass? Better off usin' you to fatten the pigs.

SERGEANT: What a heap of imbeciles! You're compost, not soldiers! Keep at it and none of you will see home!

SERGEANT: Fall in! Move those feet! This is the army, not the barnyard! On the double! Move it! Now!

SERGEANT: One! Two! One! Two! And again! That ought to teach you military manners, you rabble! One! Two! One! Two! No poncing around!

PRIEST: Don the armor of courage, have no mercy. The gods be with you. Your deeds will be forgiven. To battle!

PRIEST: Let us kneel and pray for a favorable day. Gods, grant us strength and protect us in battle. We ask not for victory, for we shall win regardless.

PRIEST: Fight in the King's name, and the gods will favor you. For royal power issues from the divine. He who is victorious for the King is victorious for the gods!

SERGEANT: Soldiers! Today we enter the fray! An assault! Remember this - a soldier with no balls will likely lose his head!

SERGEANT: I said attention, imbecile! Where are you from, flunkey?!

SOLDIER: Murky Waters, Sergeant!

SERGEANT: Murky waters up your arse! Barrels of it!

SOLDIER: Yes, sir! Sergeant, sir!

SERGEANT: Now, listen up! We'll soon be joining the fray, and I must say I've never seen a lovelier war! While the knights battle it out on the walls, we head straight for the town.

SOLDIER: But Sergeant, there's a river in the way!

SERGEANT: The very reason we've spent the last week nailing together rafts and stealing - ahem - that is, commandeering fishing boats. We shall cross the river to the town in those very boats. As planned by His Majesty, King Foltest. What say you to that, flunkeys?

SOLDIER 1: I bet ten that Bados won't live to see morning.

SOLDIER 2: I'm in.

SOLDIER 1: You're a fool. Seen how they cut him up?

SOLDIER 2: I know him. He's tough. He'll bounce back, you'll see, and kill many a La Valette.

SOLDIER 1: Seen what they did to Jasper?

SOLDIER 2: The way I see it, he'll never walk again.

SOLDIER 1: If only. He'll be lucky to recognize us.

SOLDIER 2: Hm. He'd be better off dead, the veggie.

SOLDIER 1: Bloody hell, he was a good lad.

SOLDIER 2: Shut it. He's still alive.

SOLDIER 1: If that quack doesn't harm him. Won't heal him, that's for sure.

SOLDIER 1: Look at that whoreson. He's all set.

SOLDIER 2: How so?

SOLDIER 1: While we're charging at the La Valettes' pikes, he'll be lying here, safe and sound.

SOLDIER 2: He's wounded.

SOLDIER 1: Wounded? He may be squealing like a pig to the slaughter, but that's barely a scratch on his foot.

SOLDIER 1: D'you see him get hit?

SOLDIER 2: I was there when it happened.

SOLDIER 1: The La Valettes'll pay for this.

SOLDIER 2: Bloody fucking high-borns. Time to finish 'em off. Once and for all.

SOLDIER 1: That quack's to operate on Banquo.

SOLDIER 2: Hope he don't sew his dick to his forehead.

SOLDIER 1: Did he get hit in the dick?

SOLDIER 2: Yeah. They cut him up like a pig. He'd be better off dead and buried than under the quack's knife.

SOLDIER 1: Bloody hell. Had to send us a butcher instead of a medic.

SOLDIER: Bread and vodka's all you'll get.

SOLDIER: When you're ploughing for your king.

SOLDIER: Blood and mud, your brow a-sweat.

SOLDIER: Balls in a bandage, prick in a sling.

SOLDIER: That's a swiving soldier's life

SOLDIER: Taking orders, smash your foe.

SOLDIER: Coin and country, they're your wife!

SOLDIER: And a long road at your toe.

SOLDIER 1: Those trebuchets are fuckin' poundin' the pulp out of 'em!

SOLDIER 2: Must be shittin' themselves on the walls!

SOLDIER 3: Ha! Ha! Ha!

SOLDIER 4: Laugh all you like... Come the assault, you'll be slippin' on that shite.

SOLDIER 5: Better that than on me own entrails! Mh-hh-hhh...

SOLDIER 1: If it goes on like this, we'll be sipping wine in the La Valettes' chambers by sundown.

SOLDIER 2: Too true! Overwhelming force - that's what we are.

SOLDIER 3: They're getting what they deserve. I hate traitors.

WOMAN: What will happen to us?

OLD WOMAN: Foltest knows no mercy...

WOMAN: I left all my possessions at home...

MAN: You saved your head. Rejoice!

WOMAN 1: Anyone seen my man?

MAN: He stayed in the courtyard.

WOMAN 1: But they'll kill him there!

WOMAN 2: They may just take him prisoner.

MAN: The city's turned into a living hell. Foltest's men rape and pillage.

OLD WOMAN: You think they'll come here? To this sacred place?

[After the soldier shoots a woman in front of Geralt]

MAN: Aaghh! What have you done to her?

SOLDIER 1: Shut it!

SOLDIER 2: Time to pay your war tax. Gold and silver on the table. And shut your gobs!

MAN: Help!

SOLDIER: We're not draggin' 'em anywhere. We'll do it right here, right now!

MAN: Would you release us, soldier, sir?

SOLDIER: Shut it!

MAN: We're innocent.

SOLDIER: The King will decide your fate!

WOMAN: They've taken all from us save our lives...

WOMAN 1: They burned down our homes, made off with everything else... Gods, why?

WOMAN 2: Quiet down, please, before they hear us and come back!

SOLDIER: Where are these whoresons coming from? I thought we'd cleared this district!

SOLDIER: Are they springing from their graves?

WOMAN 1: Kings judgeth their subjects...

WOMAN 2: Yet should they turn abject...

WOMAN 3: The Eternal Judge shall thrice...

WOMAN 1: Put end unto their vice.

WOMAN 1: Where are our children?

MAN: In a safe place.

WOMAN 2: Safe place - that's bloody gibberish. I want to see my children!

GUARD: Sweaty as shite down here.

GUARD: I once had a young girl, a fine lass she was, I fondled her tits and I fondled her arse. My lass she has gone, fled back to her mother, and now I've no choice but to fondle me brother... Ta-da-dum, ta-da-dum.

GUARD: Wild boar would hit the spot...

GUARD: They can stick this posting up their arses.

GUARD: Me mum wanted me to be a cooper, but I knew better. Thu!

GUARD: Oh, the stench... Strapping barrels together - that's the life.

GUARD: I get pea soup one more time, I'll puke on the whoreson.

GUARD: Rotten barley for a month! Fool-born louts.

GUARD: Cook promised meat today, the stinkin' pignut.

GUARD: I'm fuckin' hungry. Hungry... hungry... Hungry!

GUARD: Four letters, back body part... Hm... Back? No...

GUARD: Huge, winged and breathes fire. Hm... Condor, maybe? But breathes fire..? I dunno.

GUARD: State whose ruler titles himself "Emperor." Hm... Not Temeria. We don't even have a king anymore... Hm...

GUARD: Your father's son? Hm... Uncle, maybe...? Yeah, uncle.

GUARD: Had enough of this dungeon. I should ask the sergeant about a transfer.

GUARD: I'll say, "Sergeant, I'd like surface duty..." Nah...

GUARD: Or... "I'd like to serve Temeria, Sergeant, not wander below ground like a striga."

GUARD: What if they send me to the front...?

GUARD: I should write to Lilly lest she forget me.

GUARD: 'Dearest Lilly, just four more years and my service will be done...' Oh, she'll love that, she will.

GUARD: 'Dearest Lilly, I cannot wait to hold you once more.' She oughta like that.

GUARD: 'Dearest Lilly, I hope you miss me as much as I miss you.' Women like that sort of nonsense.

PRISONER: One, two, three arrows flying, four, five, six humans dying.

PRISONER: A hoard of armed men dead and gone, don't you fret, your turn will come.

PRISONER: Elves sneaking through a dark birch wood, trees whispering to this devil's brood.

PRISONER: You deaf or what? I said a prisoner's escaped!

PRISONER: Guards! Where the hell is everyo--?! Guards, over here!

GUARD: So, where’s this prisoner, huh? Mind playing tricks again?

PRISONER: I swear on me mother's life, he was there a minute ago...

GUARD: I'll show you, scum! Flap that tongue of yours again and I'll rip it out!

PRISONER: Good sir, please release me. I beg you - I've two children. I'll do anything you will me to...

PRISONER: [to Geralt] Come on, mate, please let me out...

PRISONER: I beg you.

PRISONER: If you don't, I'll holler. Draw half the garrison here.

GUARD: All right, darlin', finally alone. Just you and me. Not very romantic, I'll admit, but uh... believe you me, you'll be well satisfied when I'm done.

ELF WOMAN: Don't touch me, you monster!

GUARD: I knew you'd like me. All you elf bitches like me - dirty harlots you are.

GUARD: Oh! And remember, you wake up my friend over there... he's liable to join in. Now, we don't want to be disturbed, do we? So keep your trap shut and delight in the moment.

GUARD: Now where in bloody hell did I put that key...?

[Geralt kills or knocks out this guard.]

PRISONER 1: All right, hog's down. Let's see it. What? I'll throttle the idiot.

PRISONER 2: You wanted a map? There it is, first-rate carving. Wanted me inside? Here I am. What the fuck else do you want from me?

PRISONER 1: What do we...?! You tell him.

ELF PRISONER: First of all, the pierced heart with 'Mum' on it? It's hiding part of the dungeon.

PRISONER 2: I needed a bit of courage, had a few drinks beforehand...

ELF PRISONER: You were supposed to get caught, but not for thieving, 'cause for that they whip you first.

PRISONER 1: How're we supposed to see the corridors among all those scabs?

ELF PRISONER: And we said back, not backside. How're we supposed to glance at that thing if you need to drop your trousers every time?

PRISONER: Not so bad in here. Well, I'm in on a misdemeanor, like - identity theft.

PRISONER: Outside, I got creditors to deal with... the wife... the other wife...